An Open Letter to Stephenie Meyer

Ms. Meyer,
I'm not entirely sure how to begin this letter, because there are so many things that I want to say to you. I suppose I should begin by telling you that I read your first book, Twilight. Not really because I wanted to, you understand, but mainly because I was so curious to see what all of the fuss was about. I don't know if you've noticed, since you're probably to busy enjoying making more money than I will ever see, but there's a lot of fuss about these books. And I was curious. Now, the problem for me, Stephenie, (I'm sorry, do you mind if I call you Stephenie? Typing out Ms. Meyer every time I want to address you directly is going to take too long.) is that I still don't understand the fuss. I mean, the book wasn't as bad as I was expecting it to be, but it also certainly isn't The Great American Novel, either. It's pretty much the perfect example of a book that someone would bring to read at the beach: a petty distraction and the kind of book that nobody would be devastated if they lost it. To be entirely honest, all of the characters are completely one-dimensional, especially Bella and Edward. With the other characters, it's a little harder to notice because they aren't in as much of the book. But I found Bella to be completely lacking in a personality. She doesn't do anything but fall in love, which is something that really doesn't require a lot of effort. And don't get me started on Edward. Perhaps you'll argue that I'm not in the right demographic to be a fan of Twilight, but I'm fairly certain that that isn't true. While the book is considered to be "young adult," which generally translates to "teenager," and I am 20 and so no longer fall under that title, I know many people (alright, women) who also do not fit the demographic and who have loved the book. So, I don't think that's the reason. But there has to be some reason for why these otherwise extremely intelligent young women would collectively obsess over what is a mediocre book at best. I can't understand what it is, though. I asked a close friend of mine who has read all four books why she read them. This was her reply: "It's like crack cookies*. They're of no substance or real appeal and you're horrified for eating them but you can't stop 'cause you're hooked." So, I suppose you've created some sort of literary crack. Are you proud of yourself?

There are a lot of problems that I see in your book. I'm not talking about the ridiculous amount of adjectives that you insist on using, either. Seriously, I don't think I have ever read that much purple prose in one book before. (Or, as you would probably prefer "amethyst text.") And, considering the narrator is 17, the adjectives seem even more over the top. I have a very hard time believing that any 17-year-old talks like that. (And I would know, Stephenie, seeing as how I was one only 3 years ago.) But that wasn't what I was going to criticize you for, I'm sorry. There are two major problems that I want to talk to you about, one of which will end up in its own post. The first is that the relationship between Edward and Bella is highly disturbing, and that I think you're setting a very poor example for young girls with that relationship. The second is that vampires don't sparkle. (That will be in a separate post because I don't think I have enough room to tackle both of these at once.)

In all seriousness, however, the relationship between Edward and Bella seems unhealthy at best. After Bella discovers that Edward is a vampire (Did she seriously have to google vampires? How is it possible that she didn't know what vampires were? Really?), she decides to not act on the knowledge, "Because when I thought of him, of his voice, his hypnotic eyes, the magnetic force of his personality, I wanted nothing more than to be with him right now."(139). Really? Really? Do you honestly believe that the first reaction a girl would have on finding out that the boy she has a crush on is a vampire would be to shrug it off? I could understand her choosing to ignore Edward being a vampire if she had thought for more than a second about what that would actually mean. But she didn't. Because she had already decided that she would dedicate herself to him. Later on in the book, it's revealed that Edward watches Bella sleep. Honestly, Stephenie, if I woke up and saw any vampire, even Edward, watching me sleep, I would give his sparkling ass a restraining order. Do you have any idea how creepy that sounds? That is seriously screwed up. And another thing, Stephenie: Edward and Bella have only been together for a few months when Bella asks Edward to turn her into a vampire so that 'they can live together forever.' Do you have any idea of the message you're sending to young, impressionable pre-teen girls? You're essentially telling them that "It's ok to have low self-esteem because it will help you find an Edward Cullen of your very own. And once you find a man, you should devote every aspect of your life to him. If he's stalking you or watching you sleep, it's only because he loves you so very much. And don't forget that you are going to want to spend the rest of your life with him, even if you've only known each other for a few months, because the first man you meet is obviously your soul mate." Seriously, this is a horrible message to send out. While most of your readers know that this is a horrible message, I'm very worried about the ones who are too young to know that. And you should be too.
Sincerely,
Kat

*Crack cookies is a term that refers to the sugar cookies with bright colored frosting that are sold at supermarkets and have no real taste. The name comes from a joke that the cookies are made up of sugar, flour, water, and crack. The cookies taste horrible and yet people cannot seem to stop eating them.